Vanity Fair 1983

I make a few runs up to my neighborhood thrift store every week. I buy magazines there all the time. I can pick up In-Style, Elle, Vogue and Vanity Fair for .40 cents a piece. They are usually a few months old but what do I care, I have no need to be cutting edge around my kids.
I was there a few days ago when this magazine caught my eye. My first thought was that Vanity Fair had changed it's design. On closer inspection I saw that it was from October 1983, very strange since it was in pristine condition, nary a dog ear to be found on any page. I paid my .40 cents and took home my mag with Susan Sontag on the front (looking solemn like any good feminist writer should). Flipping through this magazine is like going through a time warp. Let me share some of the highlights. First off let's go with something positive.

Gas prices got you down? Well back in 1983 gas may of been 1.24 a gallon, but the price of a year subscription to Vanity Fair? 24 frickin dollars! In 2006 that same subscription onlys costs $18. Yep, I thought that would make you feel better. The only two things that go down in price the longer they have been around: subscriptions and electronics. Which brings me to this.......

1983 technology. I know this ad would of been so much better if it was selling beta. Alas it is VHS, but what strikes me as novel is the fact that in 1983 this is so portable (that's what the ad says). Well I guess if your definition of portable is that you can pick it up with out getting a hernia, well then yeah, I guess it's portable. So is a suitcase. I would love to tell all the people of 1983 (including myself) what portable technology will be like in 2006. Try a few ounces.
Nothing gets dated faster than technology........and fashion.

I was really disappointed with the 1983 advertising. In the present day Vanity Fair mag you can find goo gobs of luscious shiny ads for Gucci, Prada, Dior, etc. I look at this ad at the left and all I can think is "Where are the naked people?" God. How boring.
Back in 83' J. Jill was limited. She was also selling horrid, high neck, corduroy frocks for top dollar. Nowadays J. Jill makes clean, crisp, cotton clothes for stylish older women like my Mother.

Who could forget this?

The smell of conspicuous consumption. I have a vivid memory of Giorgio, one that can almost always trigger a migraine. I was in seventh grade and I was babysitting for a couple who lived off Ward Parkway. They were probably in their late twenties or early thirties, I was 13, so all I knew was that they were old. He had his Beemer and she had a big ol' bottle of GIORGIO BEVERLY HILLS. Which she doused herself in before she left. Which gave me a headache for the whole time I was there.

And last but not least here is Leona Helmsley. The successful bitch of the 80's. Martha inherited that title in the 90's.











On a totally unrelated note: I saw Strangers With Candy last night. HILARIOUS. If you are in the mood for absurd, politically incorrect, lewd, twisted, gross-out comedy then I highly recommend it. It was funnier than 40 Year Old Virgin and Wedding Crashers put together. A big dose of Stephen Colbert didn't hurt either.